Autism and Trusting God

It's been a while since I posted.  The addition of kid #5 this summer has taken up most of any down time I used to have.  Even now, she's on my lap - drooling on the keyboard and trying to grab my hands while I type.  She's barely napped today - why isn't she tired?  I am.  Anyway - that's why I haven't posted lately.  But, I felt like this was important, so I forced myself to make time for it.  Hopefully, I'll be back to regular posts eventually. :)

I recently shared with my church the experience that our family went through a few years ago when our oldest son was diagnosed with Autism.  Afterward, several people said that they were encouraged by hearing my experience.  So, I thought I would share it here, too.  If it can be an encouragement to someone else, then great.  I trust that God will use it as He wants to.

Here it goes....

At age 3 1/2, our oldest son, Cade, was diagnosed with Autism.  My response at first was generally matter of fact. “Okay, let’s learn how to live with this.”  Not long after, Nathan (my pastor) preached a sermon on 2 Corinthians 12:1-10, where Paul describes pleading with the Lord to take away the thorn in his side. One of the things Nathan pointed out in that sermon was that God had given Paul the thorn in order to keep him from being conceited – that whatever the thorn was, was not as bad as what would have happened without it.  Nathan said that, sometimes there are thorns in our lives that are painful, but better for us than life without that pain.  I remember thinking, “Really?! Are you kidding me?!  My son having Autism is better than him not having it?  Better for who?  For me?  For him?”  That day as my community discussed the sermon, I just sat there and cried.  I couldn’t even get out in words what I was thinking.  But, that didn’t matter.  My community just stopped everything and prayed for me.

Right at this same time (because God’s timing is like this) I was listening to Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  I remember being on a walk one evening, listening to the book.  I don’t remember which part of the book I was hearing, but I remember thinking “How on earth is Cade having Autism a loving thing for God to do? How is that love?  It isn’t even fair – let alone loving!”  The wrong-ness of it overwhelmed me and I just started running – and if you know me at all, you know it takes a lot to get this girl to run.  I just kept running through the streets of my neighborhood, pleading with God to show me how this was good, how this was loving.

And then, gently but persistently, the Holy Spirit started reminding me of who God is – Creator of a universe more vast than my mind can comprehend; Author of time and life itself; Righteous Judge of all creation; Servant Savoir who gave His life for mine; loving Father who accepted his Son’s sacrifice; Risen King who conquered sin and death.

I remembered the words of Isaiah 40:28 and 29.  “Do you not know?  Have you not heard?  The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired and weary and His understanding no one can fathom.”

As I thought about who I know God to be, and as the Holy Spirit reminded me of God’s character, I began to know the peace that passes understanding.

Did I understand why Cade has Autism? No.  Was I glad about it? No.  But I do know that God is good and I can trust Him, even when I don’t understand what He’s doing.   And that through any pain that may come, He is there to comfort me.

Psalm 94:17-19 offered me encouragement then, and continues to even now: “If the LORD had not been my help, my soul would soon have lived in the land of silence.  When I thought ‘my foot slips’ Your steadfast love, O LORD, held me up.  When the cares of my heart of many, your consolations cheer my soul.”

Sharing this with my church family involved a fair amount of tears, and me stopping a few times to try to compose myself.  I say "try to compose myself" because I did try, but wasn't all that successful.  It doesn't matter. Through me falling apart in front of everyone, God still chose to use my story to bring Himself glory.  Really, that's all that matters.  I hope that by my sharing this, He will continue to do just that.

I'm generally not one to ask people to "share" my posts with others, but if you know someone who may be struggling - with a child with special needs, or any other unexpected life circumstance - please consider passing this along.  I know that when we first started our journey on this road, hearing from other moms and families was so powerful and encouraging to me.  Thanks :)

Until next time, my friends.... Live well.
Becky

Absurdity, green beans, chicken, and bananas - it all comes together

I had a realization recently.  I LOVE absurdity!  Anything that's wacky, ridiculous, and way out there in left field - these are the things that can make me laugh even on the most difficult days.  And I love to laugh :)  I guess I just had never thought about it much before, but the other day I was trying to describe one of my favorite TV moments to someone and the best thing I could say about it was that it was completely absurd. This is why I love movies like Airplane!, Monty Python, and any Earnest movie ever made. (Although Earnest Saves Christmas is the best).  It's why I love shows like The Office, Parks and Recreation, 30 Rock, and Raising Hope. Characters like Michael Scott, Burt Chance, and Andy Dwyer don't come along every day.  And let's face it - Maw Maw is in a league of her own.

Real life is just hard sometimes, you know?  So, it's good to leave it behind and enter the world of "anything can happen" and "that just happened".  To laugh at the awkward moments and the zany schemes, knowing that it will somehow all work out in the end - it's a beautiful thing. 

In the times I haven't been reveling in absurdity, I've worked on a couple of recipes I thought I'd share.  Two of them are ones I kind of did on my own (and, yes - they turned out okay!).  The other is from one of my favorite blogs, nomnompaleo.com

Here's the braised beans with tomato and onion.  I was surprised at how easy this was, as well as how tasty it was.  I never really thought about those three things going together, but it worked!  Unlike the orange carrot soup disaster!

Then, I fried up some "chicken fajita filling" - since I wasn't going to eat the tortilla part, I just forked up the chicken and veggies.  I remember not liking peppers in the past, but I really like this dish.  It was also super simple (bonus!).

My second creation was what I'll call "banana nut cookies".  I actually got the idea for the recipe from a post that I've seen floating around Facebook. It wasn't Whole 30, so I made a couple of adjustments and added in a little extra sweetness with some Enjoy Life brand chocolate chips :)

Okay - both of these recipes are super specific.  So, pay attention and follow them to the letter!

Chicken Fajita Filling

Ingredients
- 4 cooked chicken breasts ( I roasted mine)
- 1 tbsp coconut oil
- 1 red pepper
- 1 green pepper
- 1 yellow pepper
- 1 onion
- a few dashes of chili powder
- a few dashes of paprika
- Salt and pepper to taste

1. Cut the peppers and onion into whatever size looks good to you
2.  Cut the chicken into bite size pieces
3.  Heat the coconut oil in a pan
4.  Throw in the peppers and onions for a few minutes
5.  Throw in the chicken and spices
6.  Let it all simmer together for about 10 minutes or so
7. Yum :)

Banana Nut Cookies

Ingredients:

- 3 mashed, ripe bananas
- 1/3 cup apple sauce
- 2 1/2 cups crushed almonds and cashews
- 1/4 cup almond milk
- 1 tsp vanilla
- 1 tsp cinnamon
- some (as much as you want) Enjoy Life chocolate chips

1.  Use a food processor to make your almonds and cashews kind of like a powder.  (They are being used as a substitute for oats - so think that consistency)

2.  Dump all the ingredients in a bowl and mix it up

3.  Place the "dough" on a cookie sheet in cookie-like shapes

4.  Bake at 350 for about 15-20 minutes.  (I think mine took closer to 20)

They come out still a bit soft - but they're good :)

So, how's that for specific?  Just remember, the most important part for both of these is the "throw it all together and mix it around" part. :)

Music of the week:  Despite the fact that I have been listening to all kinds of other music, the Frozen sound track has been firmly stuck in my head at all hours of the day and night.  It seems to have become my brain's default setting.

Until next time, my friends.... Let It Go, Let It Go - no, no - I mean, Live Well!

Becky

Being "those people" - whole food eating on vaca!

My family and I recently went on a sort of mini vacation to a water park themed hotel for a couple of days. We had a blast.  We were water logged, exhausted, and happy by the end of our stay.  However, the trip to provide the challenge of what to eat while we were there.  Of course, there were all kinds of restaurants in and around the hotel.  And, of course, none of these touted a "whole foods/paleo" menu.

We had to decide how rigid we needed to be with our family's eating habits - would we be "those people" who go on vacation and bring their own food?  If it were just my husband and me, I think that we would have "cheated" and not felt too bad about it.  (He did, after all just take me out for my birthday recently and we both enjoyed stuffing our faces with whatever we wanted!).  But, the bigger question revolves around our oldest son who has been diagnosed with Autism.  The paleo diet has helped him in ways we never dreamed.  If you don't know him well, he can basically pass for a "typical kid" - which is a far cry from where he was when we started.  So, for us, sticking to the diet has larger implications than just whether or not our stomachs might feel icky for a day or two.

So, yes- we were "those people".  We brought an entire cooler and food bad with us and used the hotel room's fridge and mircowave to heat up our meals.

What does a family of six take for quick, reheatable meals for their vacation?  Well, here's what we had packed for our water park loving fuel:

- Lots of various nuts and fruits
- Shepherd's pie (basically meatloaf with mashed potatoes on top)
- "Kid Chili" (browned hamburger then simmered in spaghetti sauce, with a little extra tomato sauce and some chili pepper and paprika added in)
- Cauliflower soup
- Oven roasted brussels sprouts and bacon

We did do one "cheat meal" which included getting some hotdogs (no buns!) for the kids to eat in the car after leaving the hotel.  Hey, we're not that crazy. :)

Until next time, my friends.... Live well!

Becky

Thoughts from my thumb

No, my thumb isn't thinking.  I am thinking about my thumb.  Weird, right?  Keep reading...

So I recently injured myself during one of my cooking adventures.  I literally took off part of my thumb while chopping an onion.  Yeah, I know - I'm super coordinated and graceful and all that....

Anyway, as my thumb healed, I was struck by how all kinds of healing can be very similar.  Sometimes in life, we have other types of wounds - wounds in our hearts.  These can be just as painful (sometimes more) than being physically hurt.  It seems to be that the healing process for bodily injury and the wounds of our heart have a lot in common.

- At first, my thumb hurt so much that I just kept it wrapped up all the time.  I didn't let any air get to it at all because even that increased my pain.  When I finally took the bandage off a few days later to let my doctor check on it, it smelled terrible.  Seriously - really bad.  Have you ever had an experience that hurt so much that you could hardly even think abou it -  let alone talk about it?  To bring it out into the open seemed like it would be so painful that you weren't sure if you could stand it?  And all the while, it's there under the surface, hurting and stinking.  It's super hard, but true healing can't happen until the wound has been allowed to see the light of day.

- Just days after I hurt myself, I was ready to be done with the whole thing.  I really wanted my thumb to be better.  I knew that it would eventually heal, but I also knew that this would take time.  But, I didn't want it to take time - I wanted the use of thumb back, and I wanted it NOW!  I didn't want to have to keep taking medicine every few hours just to take the edge off.  I wanted the pain to go away and stay away.  The doctor told me, "It's going to have to heal from the inside out, so it'll be like this for a while."  Right....  The hurts of our hearts also have to heal from the inside out.  And it takes time - more time that we would like usually.  Once we've allowed our wound to be aired out, we want relief.  Maybe we understand it won't be instant relief, but we sure don't want the pain to last any longer that it absolutely has to.  But you can't cheat pain.  And you can't cheat time.

- As my thumb was healing, it went through various stages of looking "okay" to looking "wow- pretty gross".  It's not like it started out bad and just kept looking better and better.  It would look better, then worse again, then better again.  Our other pains are like that, too.  Some days we take a breath and think "I think it's getting better."  Other days, the pain is ugly and overwhelming again.  Healing is not a straight path.

- The night that I injured myself, the ER doctor told me "That part of your thumb and fingernail won't grow back."  Yes, it's a small injury (and I don't want to make it seem like I've lost a limb or something), but still - part of me is now different than it used to be.  When painful things happen to us, it's natural to want to "just go back to normal".  We wish we could erase the pain, "move on", or "get over it."  The truth is, painful things change us.  We can't go back to how life was before it happened.  We are different now.  It doesn't have to be a bad thing or a good thing - it just is the way it is.   

 - Update!  So, I started this blog post a couple of weeks ago.  My thumb still looked really bad and was obviously missing part of itself.  Well, the healing has continued and I'm happy to report that things are looking better than I'd imaged they would.  My thumb in "rounding out" nicely, so it no longer looks flat on one side.  And the nail is actually starting grow back.  So here's the thing - the above paragraph is no less true - pain changes us.  AND sometimes it doesn't change us as much as we thought it would.  Sometimes, the part of our lives we thought we wouldn't get back, ends up unexpectedly returning to us. 

I'm glad my thumb is healing.  It's so amazing to have the use of it back again.  Although, I was getting pretty good at the "pointer finger - middle finger  claw grasp".  :)

We all have our pains and hurts that we carry around with us.  This is just the stuff of life.  My prayer for all of you is that you give your hurts a chance to heal.  Nothing is hopeless.  It may not be a walk in the park, but it's not hopeless. 

Until next time, my friends........ Live well

Becky

Something new... Baked Salmon!

We are not fish eaters at my house.  Andy's motto when it comes to seafood is "If it's from the sea, it's not for me."  I grew up with my dad saying "When they find a fish that tastes like steak, I'll eat it."  The only "seafood" I used to eat was fish sticks (heavy on the tartar sauce) and popcorn shrimp (heavy on the breading).

But I'm always hearing how good for you fish is.  Several of the blogs that I frequent have a whole section on sea food recipes. So, I decided that maybe I'm missing out.  If nothing else, fish really is healthy and it gives a little bit of variety to a meat-heavy diet.

This week, I decided to jump in with both feet and try a salmon recipe.  This Lemon Dill Salmon was very easy to make.  The hardest part was wrapping up the parchment paper the right way.  It definitely looked very "professional". 

I had a taste test as soon as I took them out of the oven.  I can't tell yet if I like it.  It's just different.  I think my taste buds were wondering "What is this?" and weren't sure what to make of it.  I still might end up drowning it in tartar sauce, but that doesn't take away from the nutritional value, right?

Then, to be on the safe side, I tried this new Sweet Potato Chili.   

Disclaimer:  The picture from the website loods about 100  times better than my picture, so don't let mine deter you!

 I didn't have avocado to top it with, but still scooped myself a bowl for lunch today.  My taste buds knew exactly was to do with this one - rejoice!  It was awesome!!  I had to hold myself back from eating about three helping right then and there.  I might have a new favorite.

I'll have to let you all know how the fish-eating works out this week and how much tartar sauce was used :)

Music of the week:  My wonderful husband made a Pandora station for me that was based on Tub-Thumping (after he got done mocking me).  I enjoyed Matchbox 20, Bare Naked Ladies, Goo Goo Dolls, Wallflowers, Third Eye Blind, and so many more!!  It all brought me back to days of singing at the top of my lungs in the car with friends, sunny days at the pool, backstage before a show, and the days of not knowing just how good I really had it.  It was a fun day :)

Until next time, my friends..... Live well.

Becky      

Fail!!

So, in keeping with the "soup for breakfast" thing I've had going, I decided to try a new one.  This one is Orange Carrot Ginger soup, from the Vitamix recipe book.  The color looked nice and bright.  I thought "It seems like those three things wouldn't go together, but sometimes surprising combinations are really good.  Why not try it?"

Well, I'll tell you why not.

It was easy enough to make.  Just throw everything into the blender and away we go.  As I was blending, I thought a few times, "Wow - that's kind of more yellow that I thought it would be."  I checked the picture in the book and guessed it wasn't that off, so let's keep going.  After it was finished, I took a sample bite. My first thought was,  "That's interesting."  I took another bite.  It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't great.  I figured I'd still eat it - since I went to the trouble of making it - but I probably wouldn't make it again.

The next day I warmed it up for breakfast and sat down.  About three bites in, I just couldn't do it anymore.  I keep trying to find the words to describe how this tasted.  The words "too bright"  keep popping into my mind.  I know that doesn't give you much to go on.  I'll just say my initial thought that those three foods don't seem like they go together seems to have been correct.

Thankfully, I had some back up chocolate chili in the freezer.  :)

After that fail, I really wanted some comfort food of things that I KNEW would go together.

Enter "Paleo Apple Crisp"

- 3 apples, cored and sliced
- 1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
- 2 tbsp brown sugar
- 1/2 cup crushed cashews

1.  Throw the sliced apples in a baking dish
2.  Sprinkle with remaining ingredient
3.  Bake at 350 for about 30-45 min
4.  Be comforted

I'm not sure if this really counts as a "recipe" because it's just throwing stuff in a baking dish and then in the oven.  And also a word of caution - go easy on the brown sugar.  It's still sugar.

Music of the week:  Just the sounds of our busy life.   I've been cooking with lots of other stuff going on the last couple of weeks - so no music to share this time.

Until next time, my friends..... Live well.

Becky

Beautiful Chaos (Plus Chocolate!)

After dinner at our house is often a busy time.  Usually, Andy and I are doing what we can to clean up dinner, catch up on laundry, rotate kids through baths, or maybe even have a little bit of conversation.  The kids, on the other hand, are typically running full speed through the house engaged in a host of imaginative activities.  On any given night at our house, you might experience:

-  A real life version of temple run -  kids running, jumping, sliding, anything to "avoid the monkeys and get the treasure out."
- Various versions of "Who Let the Dogs Out", "We Will Rock You" and "What Does the Fox Say?"  (of course, they only know a couple lines of each song, so it's just those lines - over and over and over)
- Ninjas, princesses, monsters, detectives, heroes, cowboys and girls, and almost any animal you can think of (and maybe some you wouldn't think of )

- My kids' version of the Olympics, including "running the course of 1,000 deaths" and "climbing the tower of fire"
- Family games (some favorites are Quarriors, Flashpoint Fire Rescue, Forbidden Island, Hey That's My Fish, and Pokemon)

- Real life version of Pokemon or Skylander battles (complete with never-seen-before powers)

There are days when I think "It's going to be so nice when the kids are older and the house is quiet."  The other day, I was home alone for a bit.  And the house was quiet.  And I really missed the craziness.  I realized that, while a break from the chaos is great now and then, I think I'm really going to miss the loud, busy, never-know-what-to-expect part of my life that my young kids provide.  Where else can I get all of that imagination and energy? 

Don't get me wrong - a quiet evening at home still sounds good some days.  Sometimes I'm downright desperate for one.  But I also don't want to miss out on the enormous blessing I have at this moment - this part of my life that I only get to live once.  Right now, my kids actually LIKE being at home and playing with each other and with mom and dad.  I know that's not going to last forever :) 

So, I'm working on savoring the moments - the noise, the wackiness, the creativity, the mess.  There will be a day when the kids are grown, my house is quiet and clean, and I'll be glad to remember these days when imagination overflowed, when I had all manner of "visitors" grace our home, when I couldn't walk into a room without stepping on a toy.  I will be glad that the walls of my home and heart have known laughter, learned from conflict, and experienced worlds beyond my own imagination.

In the meantime, a girl's just got to have some chocolate to get through some days!!  I found this recipe for Fudge Bombs - and it hits the sweet spot!  

Another bonus - they are a cinch to make.  Except for the part where I was getting out the aluminum foil and the little tabs on the box didn't hold, sending the roll flying out onto the floor......

Oh well - bring on the chaos!

Music of the week:  Simon and Garfunkel  - how can you go wrong with that?

Until next time, my friends...... live well.

Becky

All I need... Reflections from Sunday

This week the sermon at my church was on Mark 10:46-52.  In this passage, Jesus heals a blind man.  The main point was this: Jesus was the answer to this man's problem, and He is the answer to our problems.

So, I got to thinking.... sometimes the things that I think are my problems, really aren't problems at all. There may be things in my life that I would give my right arm to change - and they aren't going to change.  In my all-too-often narrow view of things, this makes them a problem.  And while it's true that there might be uncomfortable, painful facts about my life -that doesn't mean they're a problem.

The truth is, I really only have one problem.  And it's a big one.  It's one I can't solve.  The problem is this:  I am a sinner who will one day stand before a Holy God.  This is one meeting that I can't cancel, and no amount of rationalization/explanation/justification on my part can take away the fact of my sin.  I cannot solve this problem.

God knew that I couldn't solve this problem.  He's known it from the beginning of time.  That's why he sent The Answer.  Jesus is what solves this problem for me.  He washes me clean and makes me holy so that, when I do stand before the Father, I can stand with confidence that my sin is no more.  Jesus solves the unsolvable problem.  He answers the deepest need of my soul.

This is a truth that I find such freedom and comfort in.  It's not about me and what I do, earn, or accomplish.  I don't have to "try hard to do good".  A couple of years ago, while having a "moment" and grasping my inadequacy of fixing myself, I grabbed some paper and a pen and starting writing:

"Every time I come to the end of myself, I find Jesus.  And when I turn around and look back, I see that it was Him all along - He has always been woven through and is the cord that has never broken, even when all the other strands are frayed and cut.  There is Jesus, holding it all together, loving me and bringing me along to the end of myself so that, finally, I can rest in the One who has already completed the work that I could never do.

It hurts to come to the end of myself - to feel my life being stretched and pulled so that strands are taught, and fray, and snap.  The unraveling of my strength is painful.  But eventually there comes the moment when I am thankful for it.  I am thankful to know that I can't hold it together, because trying to was killing me.  I don't have to hold on to the broken, twisted strands.  I just have to hold on to Jesus.  He never breaks, never frays.  So, it hurts to come to the end of myself, but that's when I see my Savior and truly find my life."

Please understand that I am not trying to make light of the many horrific problems that occur in our world.  I am not saying that the ONLY need we have is to have our sins forgiven and to enjoy a relationship with our Savior.  What I am saying is that, when we understand how our biggest problem has been solved, our deepest need met, we are then free to serve others and meet the other needs that exist.  When I am no longer motivated by guilt or obligation, I can truly be motivated by love to see the needs of those around me and demonstrate Christ's love by working to meet those needs. 

What I am also saying is that, when I realize how my biggest problem is solved and my deepest need is met, the other things in my life that I might complain about as being "problems", don't seem so problematic anymore.  They might still be painful, but who said pain is always a problem?  Sometimes pain teaches me things that comfort could never show me.  Sometimes pain gives me compassion and empathy for others.  Sometimes pain chisels away my self-centeredness, making room for grace and mercy. 

I am truly, literally, eternally grateful that God saw my need, reached down and met me where I was.  And, I am grateful for the reminders that He is all I need.

Until next time, my friends..... live well.

Becky

Baby it's cold outside...

So, I'm realizing that I don't feel motivated to write a post until I have some kind of title for it.  Huh....  I've always been kind of a "big picture" person (or at least, not a detail person), so maybe I need my "big idea" before I can move forward.  I think this makes sense because it's also how I process information.  Tell me your point up front, and then let me use that framework to hang all the other stuff on and I'm good.  What's that you say?  You want me to get to my point?  Well, I guess it's only fair.....

It's been crazy cold and snowy here.  It seems like it's been forever.  We have Polar Vortexes dropping down from wherever they come from, my kids have had six (Count'em SIX!) snow days already this year, my poor husband is beginning to have a traumatic response to seeing snow shovels, the air has that dry-cold-take-your-breath-away feeling when you walk outside, and our yard is nowhere to be seen underneath giant snow piles from the snow from the driveway.  And it's only the beginning of February!  Spring can't some soon enough.

But it's not spring.  Not yet.  (sigh)  One thing I talk a lot about in my job is the idea of acceptance.  You might not like it, you might wish it was different, but in order to do what you need to do - you have to accept that it is the way it is.

So, in the spirit of acceptance, I decided to make something this week that helps warm me up from the inside out when I eat it - Chili.  And not just any chili.  Chocolate Chili.  Yes, you read that right.  Chocolate chili.  I know it sounds kind of gross, but it's awesome.  This week, I made a double batch and froze half.  I'm expecting that winter will be around for a while yet, so I'll need more again soon.

And, just for fun and because they're delicious, I made these stuffed mushrooms. 

Music of the week:  "10,000 Reasons" by Matt Redman.  It came on my Pandora station at least 5 times and I just never got sick of it.  It's still in my head and I really don't care.  Such a great song.

Until next time, my friends.....live well.

Becky

Blessings of a small kitchen

My kitchen isn't the smallest kitchen.  It isn't the biggest, either.  Sometimes while I cook, I can find myself grumbling about lack of counter space, lack of cupboard space, or the fact that more than one person in the room starts to feel crowded.  Admittedly, I can get wrapped up in our culture's "bigger is better" mentality.  I can fall into comparing what I have to what others have, breeding discontentment in myself and my circumstances.  I know it's silly, but I do it anyway.  

This mindset takes away from the enjoyment I get when I cook.  Not just that, - it takes away my thankfulness for the MANY good things I have, not just in my kitchen.  For me, when discontentment starts in one place itdoesn't stay there.  It leaks into almost everything else.   And it can happen so fast, yet so quietly, that I hardly even notice until I'm grumpy and irritated at things that I didn't care about a half hour ago.

So, this week while I cooked, I decided to focus on why my kitchen is great.  As I thought about it, I realized there are benefits to a smaller kitchen.

1.  I can close the oven door with one hand while also using a foot to close the dishwasher.
2.  I can get something out of the fridge while still stirring something on the stove.
3.  Any ingredient that I might need in a hurry (which I often do because I realize at the last second that I forgot something) is only an arm's length or a few steps away.
4.  It forces me to be creative in the ways that I use the space.
5.  I can help kids with homework or easily carry on a conversation with someone at the kitchen table while I cook.
6.  I don't have to carry the food very far from the stove or oven to a counter or table. (This works well for me because I sometimes over estimate the toughness of my hands and how much heat they can handle)
7.  When I play music I can hear it from anywhere in the  kitchen without it having to be very loud.
8.  If (when) I burn food, I only have to turn around to dump it in the sink.
9.  Less counter space means I HAVE to clean as I go - which means less clean up at the end :)
10.  My favorite - it's easier for my husband to sneak up on me and surprise me with a hug and kiss.

In my small kitchen, I made another soup.  Yeah, I know - I already posted on soup.  But I found this one and had to try it.  It's hearty and filling, with a good mix of meat and veggies.  Here's my Butternut Stew with Pork and Spinach.  (Only I didn't have pork so I used ground beef instead.  It was still delicious!)

Music of the week:  Caedmon's Call.  Another old favorite and where we got our oldest son's name.

Until next time, my friends....live well.

Becky

Soup! It's what's for breakfast!

One of the biggest adjustments for me in this new way of eating has been what I eat for breakfast.  I have always loved breakfast.  As a kid I would eat two huge bowls of cereal every morning for breakfast.  On Saturdays, we had pancakes.  On Sundays we had waffles.   And, I would sometimes have another bowl of cereal at night for a snack.  Ah, yes - the glorious carb loaded, high sugar breakfast.  I loved it.  So, when I cut out grains and sugar from my diet, the big question was, "What on earth do I eat for breakfast?".

The first answer is:  eggs.  They are so good for you.  They've got plenty of protein, you can cook them a zillion different ways so you won't get bored.  My kids eat them every morning for breakfast.  Here is my problem.... I have never liked eggs.  No matter how you cook them, I just can't get past the taste and texture.

But, I recently decided it was time to grow up, put on my big girl pants, and eat some eggs.  So, one morning I made fried eggs.  About 30 minutes later my stomach was cramping and feeling sick.  I thought it was strange, but didn't know what was causing it yet.  Then next morning, I had the same breakfast, and the same thing happened.  I started to wonder if it was the eggs.  The next morning I didn't eat any eggs and my stomach felt fine.  Just to be sure, I tried eggs one more time and, sure enough, I felt sick until lunch time.  So, it turns out that my dislike for eggs wasn't just preference after all.  It seems that I can have them in limited amounts - like as an ingredient in something else when the amount of actual egg I consume is very minimal - but I can't have them as a main part of my meal.

That left me with a big, gaping hole in my breakfast menu.  What was I going to eat now?  I tried fruit, but there's no fat or protein, and hardly any calories in fruit.  By itself, it could barely hold me for an hour after I ate it.  Plus, once the sugar rush wore off, I was crashing big time.

Then, I read on a recipe blog that soup can make a good breakfast.  Soup?  At first it seemed so weird to me.  The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea.  Something smooth and hot and flavorful to start my day?  Yes, please!  So, each Saturday, one of the things I make for the week is a big batch of soup to have for breakfast.  I really love the creamy soups - it's almost like having oatmeal or cream of wheat, but with broth and veggies instead of dairy and grains.  Sooooo good!

One of the first soups I made, and the one that I think might be my favorite is the Silky Gingered Zucchini soup.  It's seriously amazing.  The first time I had it, I literally let out a contented sigh when it hit my taste buds.

That's what I made for myself this week.  It was so cold here and there's a bit of heat to the flavor of this soup.  It was perfect!

By the way, that orange thing on the plate with the sausage is an orange that I managed to completely mangle while peeling it :)

Here are a couple of my other favorite soups that I will make for breakfast:  Sweet Potato Bacon soup,
Golden Cauliflower soup.

Breakfast is, once again, a wonderful, beautiful meal that I look forward to each day.  I know, I'm getting sentimental over a meal - but seriously - it's so good!!

Music of the week:  After the craziness of the holidays, I decided to cook in quietness this week.  (That is, until the kids got home).  It was very refreshing to work quietly in my kitchen - just me, my thoughts, and my food.

Until next time, my friends.... Live well

Becky

An Executive Pardon for Supermom

So, there's this article that I've seen floating around the Facebook world a couple of times now. "Killing Off Supermom".  When I first read the article, I wanted to cheer.  "Yes!  Down with Supermom!"  It is so validating to hear how not-perfect other people are- because really we all are.

As I thought more about it, though, I realized something.  "I'm being super-judgmental right now.  Why should I want to rid the world of someone who's really good at throwing parties or keeping their house clean?"  Now, I'm not saying that most people who read the article were being judgmental - I'm saying that I was.  I am also not saying that the author was being judgmental.  I am reasonably sure that her intentions were not to create judgment.  But, for me - that's what happened.

So, here's how I'm thinking about it.  There may be some women in the world that really thrive as a mom.  They have personalities that lend themselves to structure, so they can make a cleaning schedule and stick to it.  Maybe they really, really love throwing parties and taking their kids all over the place.  Maybe there are some moms who aren't trying to prove anything - they just really like that stuff and love to do it.

For those moms, my hope is that they are doing it because they really, really do love it.  That they aren't thinking that they have to do those things so that the rest of us moms don't think less of them.  My hope is that they can be super all day long and then put their feet up at night and enjoy some down-time.  That "being super" doesn't mean "being perfect".  And if you're a mom who still struggles with the whole "perfect" thing - that's okay, too.  Truth be told, I think we all do - at least sometimes.

So, Supermom - if you're out there and you're supering-it-up all day because you feel great doing it and you genuinely enjoy doing the things that I might think you're crazy for doing - then I say "Way to go!".  I will allow you to do what you enjoy doing without judging you for it.  I will work on my own insecurities that might make me feel jealous or "less than" when I'm around you.  I will recognize that, in each our own way, we are all Supermom at something.  My Supermom ability might not be as visible as yours - and that's okay.  My Supermom ability isn't for your benefit - it's for my family.  Just like your Supermom abilities aren't for me - they are for your family.  So, I will not judge -  you or myself.

And so, whether you fall in the category of organized, tidy, and on top of it - or you fall more so in the category of "What day is it?", "I don't remember the last time I cleaned the toilet.", and "I'm pretty sure that basket of clothes is clean - I think."  - or if you fall somewhere in the middle... Here's what we all have in common - WE LOVE OUR KIDS.

Supermom or not-so-Supermom, we all love our kids to the moon and back.  Whether you're the party throwing kind, the taxi cab kind, the pack healthy lunches kind, the buy hot lunch kind, the let's-make-a-craft kind, or the let's-sit-and-watch-a-movie kind...  The one Supermom ability we all have is to love our kids with a love we didn't know we possessed until we held our little ones for the first time.  If you ask me, that is by far the best kind of ability to have.

Until next time, my superfriends.... live well.

Becky